Ironically, one of the greatest fears we humans have is that we will be vulnerable if we express our true self to the world. In an attempt to “protect” ourselves, we many times project emotions which we do not authentically feel, display behaviors which are designed to please others, and say things we don’t really mean.
Why do we do this?
We live in a society in which we are conditioned to focus primarily on outer stimulation. From earliest childhood, many of us were taught by well-intentioned parents, teachers, and caregivers to define ourselves by what other people think of us. Seeking the approval of others quickly became the major motivation for most of our behavior patterns, starting very early in the lives of many of us. As a result, we may have developed a belief system that our self-worth is determined by the opinions of others rather than learning to develop our own sense of self-esteem based on inner values. Unless we became aware of this perception and chose to change it, we most likely continued to perpetuate this belief into adulthood.
Why does this cause pain in our lives?
One of the tenets of the Universal Law of Manifestation is that we attract what we project. Accordingly, if we do not project our authentic selves, we will not attract responses from other people that align with who we truly are. For example, most of us have been in numerous life situations where we have knocked ourselves out trying to please someone by being the selfless mother, father, spouse, sibling, or friend. We emotionally gave and gave until eventually we felt depleted. We were desperately seeking approval for our heroic deeds. When we did not get back what we considered an appropriate response, we felt totally unappreciated and, perhaps, even rejected. This seemingly selfless approach is far from selfless because it cultivates an environment where everyone is looking to everyone else to feel regenerated.
Does it take courage to express our true self?
Of course it takes courage to live an authentic life in which we are projecting our honest self, rather than hiding behind layers of veneers that we have designed to deflect the hurtful thoughts and actions of others. It is important to remember that “courage” (root word cuer , meaning heart ) does not mean the absence of fear; indeed, we all have fears. Having courage means that we make a conscious choice to live from the heart by choosing thoughts, words, and actions that are aligned with our spiritual values of kindness, cooperation, and respect for self and others. Interestingly, when we are being who we truly are, we are actually able to detach from needing approval from everyone else because there is an inner peace and sense of confidence that comes from living in integrity.
The only real “safety” any of us has in life is the security of being our authentic selves. Every single one of us is amazingly special. NO ONE ELSE CAN BE YOU! No other human being has your particular personality, your one-of-a-kind brain, your special body, and your extraordinary soul. YOUR UNIQUENESS is a contribution to all of humanity.
The Benefits of Courage
Acting courageously generally makes us feel good, because it involves mastering emotions.
The very fact that we celebrate courage so much tells us that it is a very human activity. Courage, in the sense of acting in a way that responds to risk appropriately, not over-confidently or in a cowardly way, will also help us to accomplish ‘good’ things.
Courage also helps us to act against those who threaten, or who act in a bad way. The Western world has traditionally revered bravery for itself; success is not necessary if courage is shown
Comments
Post a Comment